Nowt as queer as quarantine folk

Ever since some chump interfered with a pangolin in Wuhan, people have been learning to deal with isolation with varying degrees of success, depending on their mental fortitude, calibre of housemates and general level of fuckwittery. Many find themselves gracelessly shuttling between all isolation states, to the immense frustration of everyone they encounter. Here are just a few you may have the misfortune to meet:

10 genuinely scary Halloween costumes

Resist the urge to dress up as a not-very-sexy-if-you’re-honest-with-yourself  cat/witch/zombie this Halloween and go as something that will really put the willies up your neighbours (without actually putting willies up your neighbours):

Exotic family holiday sucks ass

Parents who thought they could take their children to far flung destinations to relive the exotic holidays of their youth were swiftly disabused of the notion yesterday.